Order of the Bath

Battery woes. In the country you are supposed to leave the parking lights on in the dark, but if the battery is old then it will be flat by the morning.

• 5. If you can’t get in via the key card electric door locks either because the battery in the key card is flat or the main car battery, then there is the emergency key which the salesman told you about. He also told you that the key hole is in the passenger side door handle. It is not that easy however. There is a hole the right size but the key doesn’t go right in nor does it do anything. It is, in fact, only a slot to enable you to prise the whole of the bezel off—the service department says that they often break when you do this, requiring a new one, but it can be done with care pulling the plastic part towards you with the key firmly in the slot. When removed, a full size standard door lock is underneath. If the main car battery is flat, as in my case, you still can’t open the other doors or the boot (where the jump leads are) but you can release the bonnet catch by leaning across. If you have to get in the boot then you will need to climb over the front seats and try to release the fold down rear seat and get in that way.
• 6. When the main battery dies or is removed, the radio code is lost. For maintenance, I am told there is a way to preserve it (does anyone know how?) but if it is unplanned then you need to reenter it. You did write it down somewhere didn’t you! Switch on the radio and then select preset 1. Press preset 1 a further “n” times to increment the first digit to the right value. Repeat with presets 2, 3 and 4. The display now shows the correct code number. Press the button on the underside of the steering column control (the one that selects preset/list/manual). This sets the code in the system. There may be a control on the radio to do this as well.
• 7. When removing the battery it is best not to leave the key card inserted. It can sometimes lock all the doors either as it (the battery) is removed or when it is replaced.

The 2000+ Renault Laguna (the one with no keyholes) has a few quirks which are not in the owners manual (if we still had it). These are based on experience and may be mistaken but also may also apply to other cars, especially other Renault models.

1. When the card key battery runs low it fails to operate the door mechanism. Changing the battery appears not to make any difference but the problem is that it has lost the code. Get into the car using the other key then use the faulty key (with a new battery) to start the car. This re-instates the code.
2. If the dashboard goes haywire e.g. all lights stuck on, then it can be reset/tested by removing the card key; hold down the trip computer button on the end of the stick and while it is pressed, put the key back in. This will then reset the computer and go through a test sequence. Remove the key to stop it.
3. The tyre pressure warning system is sensitive to the cold, especially sub zero temperatures. The symptoms are that all four tyres show flat and the warning light flashes. This will clear itself after about a half mile when the tyres warm up. I had it fixed once under warantee (no idea what they did) but it still does it most winters.
4. A poor contact in the electric sunroof switch can cause it to open at unexpected times. The switch is expensive (c£100) so disconnect it by pulling out the plug (the switch panel just pops off). Fortunately the default position for the roof is closed.